The full list of the colleges I applied to will probably never see the light of day, so I can pretend that I merely applied for those schools that offered me a place. It's a very communist oriented mechanism going on in my brain, I know. Report the successes with much gusto, and shoot anyone who gets wind of the failures with equal enthusiasm. The ones that didn't make it must be covered up in a web of lies and deceit so thick that anyone trying to find out the truth would be lost forever in my maze of deception.
Which is why, right now, I am happy to report that I have also applied for the University of Massachusetts, Amherst, and they have.. (as Barney Stinson would say) wait for it.. accepted me.
The weird thing is, I didn't even finish sending them the stuff they keep hounding me for. They were hounding me for my A-level grades, but by then I had already accepted my offer to Purdue, so I just ignored their emails (which were, funnily enough, sorted into my 'junk' folder). I guess they just decided that the As didn't matter all that much (which it totally doesn't. Come on, Amherst, take a leaf outta Purdue's book will ya), and sent me an invite. They even threw in a 6k per year scholarship out of benevolence (0r desperation).
This university is apparently situated in a rural setting. I don't know what made me think I wanted to study there. When I think rural, I think shady old taverns with smelly innkeepers and drunkards of dubious origins. Everyone'll be dressed in medieval peasant clothing, tearing chunks of chicken off with their teeth. Now I'm pretty sure I don't want to, although the bar fights and booze seem lovely.
I guess they won't be seeing this shady drunkard there come Fall.
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