As the dawn of my nineteenth year draws closer, I couldn't help but ponder on the implications this brings for my future. For the next foreseeable few years, this would be the last birthday I'm celebrating in Singapore, and in the company of close family and friends. The finality of the situation seems to be slowly sinking in, with the arrival of so many 'lasts'.
Last year this time, there was also a party thrown to celebrate my 18th. I still vividly remember talking to uncles and aunts about going aboard to study, and the whole US application hoopla. Back then, nothing was decided yet, no application essays were written, no final exams taken, no schools contacted. It was a very stressful period of time, and the thought of not making it to a US college would completely paralyze me with fear. There was much uncertainty with the 'staying in Singapore after canceling PR' plan too. It would be terrible if I had to leave half a year prior to the start of college.
What a difference a year can make. This time round, I'm talking to them about concrete plans and stuff that are happening for real. The party today doubles up as a farewell party for me, and marks a time in my life where the 'grown-ups' are considering me part of them. This is the biggest step of my life yet, and it feels like every bad decision in the past doesn't matter anymore. It's like I have come to this point where I begin afresh in a whole new environment, and start forging a future where I can control.
It's obvious that the road ahead is not going to be roses and rainbows - you'd have to be a certified idiot to think everything'll be fine. But to have that stop you from going for what you truly want, now that's the real idiocy. I've talked to people who are absolutely astounded by my plans of leaving my whole family behind to live alone in a distant land halfway around the globe. But I say, the world is huge and there's so much you haven't seen. Why confine yourself to the limited horizons of one island when there's a world to experience. It may not always be pleasant experiences, but they'll be unforgettable ones.
Last year this time, there was also a party thrown to celebrate my 18th. I still vividly remember talking to uncles and aunts about going aboard to study, and the whole US application hoopla. Back then, nothing was decided yet, no application essays were written, no final exams taken, no schools contacted. It was a very stressful period of time, and the thought of not making it to a US college would completely paralyze me with fear. There was much uncertainty with the 'staying in Singapore after canceling PR' plan too. It would be terrible if I had to leave half a year prior to the start of college.
What a difference a year can make. This time round, I'm talking to them about concrete plans and stuff that are happening for real. The party today doubles up as a farewell party for me, and marks a time in my life where the 'grown-ups' are considering me part of them. This is the biggest step of my life yet, and it feels like every bad decision in the past doesn't matter anymore. It's like I have come to this point where I begin afresh in a whole new environment, and start forging a future where I can control.
It's obvious that the road ahead is not going to be roses and rainbows - you'd have to be a certified idiot to think everything'll be fine. But to have that stop you from going for what you truly want, now that's the real idiocy. I've talked to people who are absolutely astounded by my plans of leaving my whole family behind to live alone in a distant land halfway around the globe. But I say, the world is huge and there's so much you haven't seen. Why confine yourself to the limited horizons of one island when there's a world to experience. It may not always be pleasant experiences, but they'll be unforgettable ones.
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