The 'I Hate iPod' Poem

You slick, shiny, silvery gadget
I chose Classic over little Nano midget
I had dreams of what owning you would be
Fill you to the brim with Mariah Carey
Blinding light reflecting off your glossy screen
The 400 dollar price tag I couldn't see
Glorious fulfillment brought to my eye a tear
Dazed, I hand my card to the cashier
Receiving the package with trembling hands
I caught a glimpse of my first tryst with romance

But then I had problems with your family
Working with iTunes made us both very cranky
Why does it insist on 'sync' whenever i link
Made me lose videos faster than I can blink
It has the cheek to be so patronizing
When it doesn't even get the meaning of synchronizing
I press sync songs and it syncs videos
Makes me wish I spent the money on a stereo
And does it think it's too good for WMA
You can take your fancy format and shove it up your A

Soon your betrayal became apparent
You hate my guts, that much was evident
Hid my songs and videos away
All 400 videos I amassed till today
You tricked me into doing a total restore
If you were flesh you'd see some gore
Now everything I put in you, you'd reject
Makes me want to crush you like a stinking insect
Now I gotta take you to town to get you serviced
Better pray hard I don't give you a memorial service

Fuck you Apple. You ruined my life.
Better not let me see you when I have a sharp knife.