Season 8 kicks off in Arizona, with Ryan standing dangerously close to the edge of the Grand Canyon and earnestly delivering the lines that Idol executives painstakingly drafted. "American Idol isn't about the destination. It's about the journey." It's followed by a stream of people staring into the camera and each delivering their version of "I am the next American Idol." My favorite part was when they showed a clip of some Archuleta's fan's reactions when he lost last year. A bloodcurling scream that shook the grounds, that's what it was. The group of incosolable girls promptly burst into tears and threw world-class tantrums. I'm quite sure Cook wouldn't be very happy watching this video. ("That loser! How could they choose that loser! AHHHH!!! Eff American Idol!!!)
Are you happy now, Cook? Look at what you made girls resort to.
This year's American Idol has been changed slightly. There's a new permanent judge, Kara
Dioguardi. She's a very sought-after song writer, and has been involved in writing songs for people like Celine Dion, Kelly Clarkson, Christina Aguilera, Britney Spears and David Archuleta. I was so excited to see how she would do as a judge. She's pretty strict with the recording artists, even daring to correct Celine on how to sing her song. You can see her in the photo (the only one who knows where to look when taking a picture.)There would be fewer 'weirdo-auditions', and they would focus more on those who can actually sing. That doesn't mean that there arn't any nut-cases that auditioned, though. Far from it. There's one sweaty guy that was quaking in fear even before the audition (he subsequently proceeded to do some rasping singing, ala Golem from LOTR, and collapsed), and a rocker dude who cried before, during and after the audition ("I just want someone to say I'm great. Sniff."), and a girl who showed up in a bikini.
The bikini girl Katrina. The first audition in so many seasons that was bizzarre in so many ways.
She shows up wearing that, and tries to sing Mariah's first single, Vision of Love. When Kara demonstrated how to sing that song with feeling and soul, she still had the nerve to say that Kara's wasn't any better. Paula got so agitated that the girl has such a bad attitude, and she teamed up with Kara to try and get the girl kicked out. It then turned into a sing-off between Kara and Katrina, and both of them were shouting the words at each other.But the sad fact that most guys are animals remain. The minute Simon and Randy see a girl in a bikini walk in, they probably already made up their minds to let her through. And since 2 yes-es get you to Hollywood, the slut got through. I wouldn't mind as much if she didn't choose a Mariah song. But show up like trailer park trash and sing one of Mariah's most important songs? What a disrespectful bitch. She'll see how Kara deals with her in the Hollywood round.Other notable contestants include the blind guy Scott. They made such a big fuss about him, just because he's blind. Does that affect his singing at all? Maybe if he was mute, now that would be something to see. Ryan then tried to high-five him after he got his golden ticket, then realized that he was blind. He then went on and said 'SEE you in Hollywood'. Seriously. For a host, he's awfully insensitive.
Season 7's Jason Castro also made an appearance, but
it wasn't him who auditioned (and he can't since he reached the undeserved number 4 spot last year), but his brother, Michael Castro. The pink haired dude proudly proclaimed to the judges that he only started singing 20 days before (obvious case of sibling rivalry) and said in the pre-audition interview that his brother was girly (which led to a very uncomfortable face-off between the brothers). His voice wasn't bad; stronger and edgier than his brother's. Simon said it was 'goodish', whatever that means, and Kara said he was 'ballsy'. and 'cocky' Which could be interpreted to have sexual connotations, but we'll pretend we don't know for now. She kept saying that she liked his 'mysterious' quality. A lot. Don't forget you have a boyfriend, Kara;) If Mike Castro makes it through Hollywood round, he would be the first sibling of a finalist to do so. But the real question is: what's up with the Castros and their hair?Randy "I worked with Mariah' Jackson, Paula "You're all great" Abdul and Simon "That was utterly terrible" Cowell returns as judges, and together with Kara "you don't have the chops to sing that song" Dioguardi, they'll terrorize, exploit and lead the finalists towards the grand finale. Let's hope this season can have as many good singers, scandals and great mentors as before.
American Idol airs every wednesday and thursday, 6pm on Starworld (Channel 18), so check it out!
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