Procrastination: A Poem

I wrote this during the math paper =) It's the reason I have so much time.

"I should get studying"
Pushed out of my mind
The day is early
I've got tons of time

Just a few notes to read
I can get through that, no problem
Meanwhile let's find
A way to rid this boredom

You expect me to revise
When I'm still having breakfast?
Just one quick glance
From 9 to 10 it's 'Ellen DeGeneres'

I'm still woozy and sleepy
Can barely even think
Maybe E-News might help
Watch some starlets on the brink

"You should be studying"
I heard my conscience say
With new resolve I head to my room
But lost half of it along the way

"Come read my daily news online"
Mariah's voice floats in
Not that I want to,
But to ignore her would be a sin

I promised myself
Ten minutes is all I allow
But three hours later
I'd completely forgotten that vow

"I absolutely must begin studying,
It's now or never!"
As i repeated that to myself
I logged on to messenger

It's now nightfall
The day is done
As for the studying
I've barely begun

At least now I'll have time
During the examination
To write a whole poem
on succumbing to procrastination

Vanessa Hudgens VS Dane Cook

Now, we've all established a thousand million years ago that Vanessa Hudgens isn't as innocent as her bookish on screen alter ego, Gabriella. Nude pics of her was leaked sometime ago, and just when we all thought she'd finally turn over a new leaf, she once again shocks (more like pleasantly surprised) the entertainment world with 'This is what Zac is getting', round 2. Okay, so everyone knows she's an idiot, firstly for taking those pictures and then for allowing them to be leaked. Hollywood clearly doesn't receive any news from its Asian counterpart, or dear Edison's tragic little story would have taught her something.

At the recent Teen Choice Awards, Dane Cook (some pathetic loser that nobody even knew existed) was on stage, and he was calling out for Vanessa. She gleefully waved at him, thinking someone was finally going to say something nice about her. The whole thousand strong crowd turned their attention at her, some even cheered. The crass and immature nonsense that spewed out of his mouth, however, was "You gotta keep your clothes on, man." The poor girl's expression immediately changed, and as strange as it seems, I actually felt a bit for the little slut.

So she has her entire naked body leaked onto the internet for the world to enjoy. Does that justify humiliating her in front of thousands of kids just for his 30 seconds of fame? What has he accomplished by first calling her out and then shaming her, other than to get himself onto all the entertainment stories? Well, he certainly has succeeded, but does he stop to think about how much he has hurt her? She may be an idiot, but she certainly has feelings too. Sure, Nickelodeon has cut that scene from TV, but it's rampant everywhere online. To mention her by name, point her out in a crowd, and then dump that kind of shit on her is beyond despicable. It actually did break my heart a little.

Do people have no empathy anymore? His joke wasn't even remotely tasteful, or humorous. They always talk about 'comic timing' in comedy. It's the timing that was important, and clearly, that wasn't the time, nor the place, to be bringing up the many skeletons in her closet. Some even say she deserves it. I wouldn't argue with you if you say she deserves being stripped (interesting choice of words) of her 'role model' status for Disney kids. But does she deserve such public humiliation? No one does. No one is going to defend her actions, because what she has done is obviously wrong, but are Dane Cooks' actions any more morally upright than hers?

Grow up, Dane. Seriously.

My Neighbour is a Schizophrenic

Guess what I found out today! My family apparently abuses our neighbor by:

- setting our dog on her
- cutting off her plants when it blooms
- forbiding her from joining a Buddhist organization
- forcing her to join a satanic cult
- threatening her if she reuses
- scaring her so much that she doesn't dare to return home

Boy do we have issues. That is, if you trust the words of a schizophrenic.

I never thought i would actually encounter any member of the highly expansive mentally ill club, but that's exactly what the seemingly innocent looking old granny (that lives in the apartment next to our's) turn out to be. That explains why she gave me the 'AHHH IT'S THE SPAWN OF THE DEMON' look when I said hi to her in the life. She was probably debating if she could take me out in a fist fight if I decided to tear her into pieces and eat her up.

She really shouldn't blame someone else for her lack of botany skills. Though, of course it would only be natural for her to think we did that to her. Happens all the time, doesn't it. Neighbors who are jealous of your beautiful cactus and decide to snip off all the little spikes.

"Hey, is that a new breed of cactus?"

"Nah, my neighbor did that."

"Oh, tough luck for you. Yeah, I have horrible neightbors too. At least yours didn't feed poison lollipops to your granddaughter."

As for the satanic cult thing, she only has herself to blame. We're just trying to show her the true path to heaven, and the silly old bird refuses. Don't they always say the fastest way to heaven is to find hell's door? We're showing her the bloody door and she refuses to bulge. Only option left is to give her a gigantic shove, to give her a little encouragement. Old people can be soooo tough to persuade. Now she thinks we're threatening her. Hello, blood thrown on your front door can hardly be counted as threatening. I mash your son's finger into your potatoes and only tell you after you're done eating it, now that's a threat.

I fear for my life now. Like, seriously. What if one day, dear old granny decides it's time to rid the world of evil, one neighbor at a time? She might decide to put on her Supergirl costume, and I don't think my poor brain can handle an 80 year old in that outfit. I'll just drop to to ground and die.

Don't do that to me, old granny!

A Couple That Dances Together, Stays Together

This is one of the most amazing and romantic things I've seen in my whole long life of 18 years. This family, instead of walking solemnly and lifelessly down the aisle to the mind-numbingly cliche wedding march, chooses to jiggle and boogie to the tune of Chris Brown's Forever. After this video became a youtube sensation, the family made use of this opportunity to promote an anti-domestic-violence cause, pleading husbands NOT to be like Chris Brown. Very nice touch =)

Forever Your (nonsense-sprouting) Girl

American Idol's never going to be the same again. Paula just released a statement on Twitter saying that she couldn't reach an agreement with the AI producers, and hence she has decided to ditch it. This, people, is what Twitter is for. Not for your constant updates on how much you love chocolate-frosted cake, cause unless you're Britney Spears, WE DON'T CARE.

Kara, thankfully, is still staying on. Looks like they would rather have the cheaper and more knowledgeable judge than the expensive and bullshit-sprouting one. But that's what we all love and hate her for, and its the main reason why anyone (fine, I) would watch it. I was looking forward to seeing how she continues to age backwards while Simon and Randy slowly become wheelchair bound. But those producers are really quite sexist. Simon's getting paid more than thirty million dollars for being rude, while Drunkla Abdul is only awarded a measely 2 million for her efforts. If Nigel was still around, he would never have let this happen.

Who's gonna provide the true entertainment of the show now? Randy's gonna be all, 'Dawg, I feel that, that was not the right song choice for me, for you..' (for the record, Randy, if you already said that it's what you feel, obviously you meant for you), Kara's gonna be all technical with the 'your pitch is right on', and Simon's just gonna be his usual 'that was like ordering a hamberger and only getting the bun' (and they claim Paula's sprouting nonsense?).
That's all fine and dandy for the judging part, but what about all the not so relevant but equally important

- "All you can do is the best you can do."
- "That may not be your best performance, but you look AMAZING and that is what's important"
- "I loved the color of your performance. It was a combination of all my favourite colors, like a rainbow"
-"You showed versatility And you still stayed true to who you are. What a concept!"

Just watch this video and you'll know what I'm talking about. (And it featured the shortest performance I've ever seen. One note and she goes on rambling like a lunatic)

and all the fighting with Simon...

- "I don't give a crap what you have to say"
-"SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" (articulate girl, ain't she)

... and we obviously can't forget that she has psychic powers and is able to judge performances before they even happen. NOW explain to me why she's not worth twenty million dollars. What competition wouldn't need a clairvoyant judge who can also use 'agility', 'substitution', 'brilliance', 'decadence', 'instinctual', 'consummate professional', 'balladeer, 'intonation', 'masterfully effortless' and 'the palette of what you're wearing' in a sentence?

It's never gonna be the same again.

MJ Dance Tribute

This was a while ago, around right after his death. Just thought it was very very cool. The looks on people's faces when they realize they're SURROUNDED by the dancers. Gives me a certain amount of sadistic pleasure.

Her Heart So Black

Intro

Another poem =) This 'project', or whatever this is, originated around a month ago. Damian and I came up with this 'rule', that 16 song titles, each of us providing 8, must be included in the poem to make it more challenging. The content is loosely inspired by events that took place over the past 5 months. It may seem like I'm exaggerating, but you'll be shocked (like, AHHH WHAT THE HELL! kind of shocked) if you knew just how much worse the actual 'events' were.

That being said, any likenesses to actual people and events are purely fictional, except for the parts that are not.

Content

Writing to condemn has never been easy
No one likes how this turned out to be
The beautiful ones only you see
For whom you sacrifice knows no boundaries
Never really liked I told you so-s
But her insatiable evil even you should know
Ridiculous, it's shouldn't hurt so much
Were so close, camaraderie only amounted to such

Months of persuasion fell on deaf ears
From our circus you eventually disappear
'Shake if off' was your new attitude for us
There was no doubt, we now know a Judas
Piece of me fell to betrayal for your sake
But so what? The heartless' one's heart was at stake
Become another tool at her disposal
Disposal you'll go, don't expect a proposal

Lady Marmalade, her laugh drives you insane
She's crazy for attention, desperate for fame
Immature little boys get little crushes, how sweet
She'll crush them after she takes what she needs
Her toxic touch poisons your judgment
Building air castles with a passion so fervent
Increasingly impossible to pull you back
Save you from her heart so black

Five months we've pleaded
Five months you've ignored
How many months more
Of discord can you afford

I watched Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, nyah nyah nyah

I'm totally mature, as you can see.

Today's the release of the new Harry Potter movie, HP and the Half Blood Prince. About freaking time, I would say. Two years is a long long time to wait for a movie. Obviously, after two years of waiting around, you can't expect me to sit around and wait some more when Emma is waiting for me to go see her. Which is why Thursday afternoon found our class rushing to Orchard to see her (well, not totally her, of course. Prof McGonagall too. We don't forget our old darlings.)

And the show begins! Death Eaters flying around in puffs of black smoke (totally cool graphics, except I don't think that's how they really move around. I always had the impression that they rode donkeys) and destroying bridges; Diagon Alley... I don't know why, but I get this thrill of exhilaration as I watch the Dark Lord's underlings bring utter desolation upon England. Hopefully it's only cause I'm excited about the movie starting. I refuse to believe that I'm evil on the inside.

Helena Carter appears! Gosh I love her. She's Bellatrix (reminds me of a certain cereal), auntie of naughty boy Draco Malfoy. Her dark, lunatic, magnetic presence just fills the screen as she prances and slithers around, be it setting the Burrow on fire or wrecking the Great Hall.

Emma is turning out to be quite the lady! Who would have thought the brainy, bushy haired little girl could turn out to be the most beautiful one in the whole movie (and yes, Transformageeks. She's hotter than Megan-watch my boobs bounce in slow mo-Fox). Ginny Weasely practically looks like a troll next to her. And the 2 male leads. Gosh. Puberty wasn't kind, that's all I'll say.

Zam! Dumbledore is dead. Funny how I don't feel any remorse for him. Probably it's cause the actor is so un-dumbledorish that my mind just doesn't accept him as Dumbledore. Dumby's supposed to be whimsical, eccentric, benevolent, but this actor only portrayed him as a mean old bastard that deserves to be flung off a tower. If it had been Richard Harris playing him, I would surely and most definitely have burst out in fake tears (to make the people around me think I'm very in touch with my sensitive side).

The movie's duration is more than 2 hours, but somehow it didn't seem so long. This film meanders around at a more mellow pace than the previous Potter films, and it injects into it a dark sense of foreboding along with the blossoming relationships. What the movie didn't manage to do was to explain the subtleties for those who haven't been reading the books (I'm at a loss at why that is, seeing how it's practically a religious experience). It didn't explain why Snape's the half-blood Prince, nor did it explain much about Voldermort's choice in Horcruxes.

Overall verdict: It's Harry Potter, for the love of Oprah. Get your ass down to the nearest cinema and watch it, if not for Harry then at least for McGonagall.

Mini Novel: Mind Over Matter

Here is an excerpt from the mini novel I wrote last Christmas. It's a paranormal mystery =)

The link to the story is located below.

________________________________________________________________

“But how do you expect me to help?” Connor asked, although he thinks he already knew the answer.

“I know you have… abilities, Connor.” Karen replied. “You have got to help me find my child. I’ve travelled all the way to the West Coast for your help, I’ll..”

“I’m sorry; I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Connor cut her off. “I have to go now; my mom is expecting me back home.” He started rising from his chair.

“Please!” Karen reached out and grabbed hold of Connor’s hands. “I know you’re psychic, you can find him! You may be the last chance I have of seeing my son, Connor… I’m dying; I just want to see my son once before I leave this world.” Karen pleaded.

Connor froze halfway up. “You’re dying?”

Karen closed her eyes for a moment to compose herself. She took a deep breath, shuddering as she exhaled. “It’s cancer. Pancreatic. The doctor predicts I have a maximum of one year to live.” Karen’s watery eyes met Connor’s. “Fulfill this dying woman’s one last wish. Please?”

________________________________________________________________

Read it here!

Journal Excerpt: 30 December 2007

Wong Tai Sin Temple, Hongkong

They took us to this temple that's famous for their fortune tellars today. There was a whole street full of fortune tellars, and the number of people praying at the temple was just overwhelming. The air was full of chocking joss stick insense. This place is apparantly famous for its amazingly accurate fortune tellars.

I said I wanted my fortune told (cause it's so fun), and we looked for a guy who could speak Mandarin. They almost always only speak Cantonese, which is so annoying since I don't. There's this guy that charges 400HKD for like the whole thing, which includes palm reading, face reading, all the whole nine yards of whatever they do. He looks nice enough, so alright then. My future's in his hands (but since he's reading my palms, I guess it's really in my hands).

He asked for my birth dates, birth times, and checked lots of books. So the conclusion:

- I have too much 水 (water) in my life. It's cause of my birthdate or something.

- I would excell in stuff related to the elements fire, wood and earth, but not water or metal. I would very much like to know what those things are. Like what? Firefighter? I would excel in rushing into a burning building? But would I excel in rushing out?

- My luck this year isn't very good, but it'll get better for the next few years.

- My life would pretty much stablize after 28. So I guess if I'm gonna do anything craz I'll have to do it within the next 12 years.

- My first born would be a boy, second a girl.

- My love life would be complicated, due to the complicated love line on my palm.

- No one is planning or will plan to back stab me.

- There are lots of good people in my life.

- He says I worry about stuff too much (cause eyebrows very close to eyes)

- I'm an easy going person, but when I make up my mind it's difficult to make me change it.

- I'm very kind hearted, but should be weary of people who might make use of that against me.

- My studying skills are not good. I have to put in a lot of effort.

He said more, but I can't remember them now. I guess the first test would be my first born.
His shop number is 88. I guess I should remember it in case I go Hongkong again.